What are the reasons why a black woman cannot find a good husband?
21 mins read

What are the reasons why a black woman cannot find a good husband?

When you look at the large number of black girls who are single mothers with two or three children without the presence of their parents, that tells you that there is a crisis within the family and all because a large percentage of women are single mothers because women Black women right now, for whatever reasons, cannot or do not want to find a good man, who is committed to being the head of the family, but also in the nurturing and support that every family relationship expects from a man.

But the question would be why are black men abandoning or not wanting to commit to starting a family with a black woman? Believe me, if I had the answer to that question, maybe all the problems that the family structure is going through would not exist where children grow up without parents, but also if there is a model of father or husband, as a way for that girl black woman have an idea of what the role of women is in marriage, but also the role of the mother as a wife.


Why can’t black women get a good man?

Answering the question, “Why a black woman can’t get a good black man, could be simple if what the woman is looking for is a man who can satisfy her most intimate needs in bed, in some cases her economic needs, and also when they are looking for a man to have a good time dancing or drinking in a nightclub, but in this case we are talking about a topic considered serious when it comes to answering why a black woman cannot find a good black man who wants to enter a long-term commitment in a stable relationship, and even more so when we talk about raising children.

Another factor to consider, which is the most important, is the strength of a family structure where children grow up learning and understanding the roles within the family of both father and mother, something that is the topic of discussion in part of this video.

To understand the reasons for this problem in the black community in the United States, where the lack of commitment of both men and women when it comes to strengthening the structure of the black family is a way to begin some of the problems that are destroying the relationship between couples in the black family, one can listen to oneself without needing to trample on, much less suppress, the opinions of those who think and act differently.

From my point of view, one of the biggest obstacles is the lack of real communication between black women and black men in a marital relationship where each person only thinks of satisfying their own needs, not the needs of others. Which makes each member of each community, a selfish person, which is not the best remedy to find a solution to the problems of the lack of family unity in the black community.

When talking about women as well as men, Each group does not speak among themselves, but they pass each other, and looking for the person responsible is the focus of attention. Both groups have learned to blame each other, which does not produce solutions to the problems, on the contrary, it is the reason why right now 70% of black women don’t have a husband or are not in a stable marital relationship, and 55% of children grow up without a father.

In short, in this fight between a black man and a black woman, the only losers are the children, who do not understand why they grow up without the love, protection, support, advice and experience shared with both of their parents. When talking about answering why a black woman doesn’t get a good man, It is not a simple answer, and even more so when we all know the complexity that exists in the marital relationship between blacks, where the shadow of slavery still partly controls the mentality of the black family, especially the behavior of the black woman and her role in the family.

Who is responsible for this situation that is negatively affecting the black family?

Is it the black man? Is it the black woman? Or is it the federal or state government? Blaming someone else for the failures of the black family will not solve the situation. I believe that understanding the reasons why a black woman cannot get a good man would not give a window to see the disastrous reasons why the black family is going through right now, where too many black women are single mothers and many black men who do not want to make a commitment when it comes to raising a family right now.

What is the reason why some young black men want to commit to raising a family with a black woman? It is the answer that we will try to find in this public forum. For a long time, black women have put the black community on their backs, which we can all see the results of. Reasons why, as a black man, it is time to assume responsibility within the community as a way to alleviate the great burden that black women have now borne, in many cases without the support or participation of men. It is time to break with that old paradigm of competition for one of comparison, which has destroyed the family.

Women always speak in videos and group reviews about this problem, where the main topics are: number one is what black women expect from a black man? Number two, the lack of commitment in black men in serious marital relationships; number three, a solution to the problem from a woman’s perspective avoiding talking about what the black man really wants; number four, black men are intimidated by the success of a strong, independent black woman; number five: the black man does not want to accept his new role in a family where both are equal. Sixth, we have to talk about the availability of a good black man as husband material.

From my point of view, very few talk about the elephant in the room, and it is important to understand the perspectives from a male point of view when defining the Problem: What is behind, Why can’t black women get a good man? Talking about the needs of black men is not on the agenda. What a black man expects in a relationship with a black woman is a question that is always lost in this type of discussion.

I learned that one can only solve a problem by researching the issue to identify the root cause, understanding the problem, planning for correction, and implementing the change. In other words, positivity without strategies doesn’t solve any problems. Change is a disruptive and destructive process, and many black men do not accept those changes that modify the dynamics of the traditional family.

Why are many black women single, or do they not have a man in their life in a stable relationship?

In each of these answers, you can get an idea of ​​what men really think, want, and expect when men Are looking for a partner within the black community. Do black women really know what men want when they enter into a marital relationship with them? This is where listening to what the other says and feels is important, not to find fault, but to find solutions that benefit both parties and, above all, for emotional stability of the black family structure, where both the man and the woman understand their roles within marriage.

Understanding that looking at the problem from the perspective that many black men have, it is important to find a solution to this problem that the black community is going through at this time, especially when we talk about the disintegration of the black family right now. My thanks to the black men who, through their comments in the different videos on this topic, we shine a light on what real black men want from a black woman in a marital relationship, where black men, as a way of thinking, they are speaking loudly. Let’s start to hear what men think about how this topic affects black women.

If you are a single black woman, and you start dating someone, don’t sleep with that person, take the time to get to know that person mentally and spiritually first. When you start a relationship off with sex, it will usually cloud your judgment of that person because you are caught up in the physical aspect of the relationship and miss those warning signals about their personality, attitudes and aspirations in life. It is easy to pretend to be someone you are not, so take the time and truly get to know someone before becoming sexual with someone you really don’t know.

As a black man, you should know their dreams first and foremost and learn to love, respect, and appreciate yourself. A woman who loves herself is in a position to love another in the same way. Your first quality relationship should be with yourself. Do this, and you will enhance your chances of finding another person who shares those values. Fix yourself first, mentally, physically, emotionally, and spiritually, and as a black woman, you will have something to contribute to the relationship.

Why do we see so many single black women now?

There are many factors, such as dependence on government programs, that are replacing the role of man, as the main provider, like Welfare, food stamps, and other entitlement programs. They are an antiquated thing designed to help single mothers who are down on their luck. Now, it’s creating single mothers who want to remain down on their luck, as it essentially incentivizes mothers to be single.

In 1960, the single motherhood rate in the black community was 22%. Now it’s upwards of 70%. The increasing welfare state has been destroying impoverished communities since its inception. Public assistance programs that do not force women to remain in a traditional family.

As a black man, when we talk about this issue that is destroying the fragile black family, at this moment, I’m older than the majority of the people who are expressing their opinion right now in this free forum, but I was married and in a relationship for twenty years. I have had plenty of opportunities to remarry, but my lifestyle changed and my priorities changed as a man friendship is key. When people are younger, they have different needs for marriage. The two of you have each other, and so the two of you will never be clingy. It appears that you have companionship already. Good men are out there, but you will have to date more than one, and most people can’t handle that process.

Let me tell you, between my partner and I, we have had our successes but also our failures, but we have learned to celebrate things together and support each other when things When it comes to family, we both need each other to improve and be better parents, but also husband and wife, where the opposition and feelings of both are not important if we want to survive in a relationship full of difficulties and challenges as a black family.

From my point of view, One of the biggest reasons why these women are single, It’s because they are too selfish. They only care about themselves. Not one addresses what a man wants. When you care nothing about what men want; it is very arrogant for you to assume that we want to involve ourselves with you. Many black men avoid being in a situation where the problem is the bad attitude and unrealistic expectations of women, which men are not willing to satisfy, when they have other choices outside the race.

I have the opinion, which may or may not be correct, that black women are single because they generally have no clue what black men want. It’s only that way because, as a group, black women have not taken an interest in trying to be pleasing to black men. They spend most of their lives trying to look good in white men’s eyes. White men, who in many cases, black women are seen as inferior, less pretty, and less intelligent than white women.

Where do these false ideas come from that are poisoning the mentality of young black girls?

Perhaps because they grew up without the presence of a male figure as an example to follow, but also to understand from the beginning what men want from their wives, which is very different from what women want from a marital relationship. Unfortunately, many black girls grew up without seeing, much less understanding, the dynamics that must exist when a woman and a black man each know their role within the family.

A black relationship becomes inside out when the woman starts acting like the man of the relationship. Here’s the deal with that from a black man’s perspective: A black man of value wants a strong woman. He wants a woman who is ambitious and can handle her business. However, when he takes the lead, it’s as if she’s being challenged, as if to say, “How dare you try to lead me?” It’s a masculine gesture.

Masculinity has no place for women. It’s not her role. Just as there is no place for a man to be feminine. It’s not a man’s role to be feminine. In a marital relationship, the woman has to accept her feminine role, if she expects the man to accept her masculine role. When both parties exchange roles, the marital relationship is not healthy. Consequently, a woman needs to submit in order for that to happen.

How can the “strong, independent women submit when the black man has not yet understood what his role is as head of the family?

Is she truly capable of submitting? These are some of the questions that exist at this moment, the answers to which many black women avoid answering honestly, but each of us, both the black man and the black woman, continue to live and perpetuate ideas that are only permissible when you personalize a character in a movie drama, and right now many black women refuse to break with that character for fear of accepting that position of submission that nature imposes on women within a family nucleus where the man is and must be the head of the family.

In addition, I’m concerned about how many women define what a “real man” is. Real talk: No woman can define what a “real man” is. I’ve heard women tell me they want a guy who’s nice, treats them well and is an overall good guy. In the real world, those same women end up in relationships with guys who do not treat them well. It could be because many black women like you, despite experience with men who have not known how to value a woman, have also not understood that the only person responsible for the type of man she attracts is herself.

As a woman, a question that you must answer is, “What do you contribute to a relationship so that a man likes that man, an idea that only exists in your mind, takes you seriously? This is where, once again, understanding your role within a marital relationship where sex is not the main thing will give you an idea, why that type of ideal man does not take into account women like you.

I hate when people think that just because you’re single, you’re miserable, I enjoy my own company, and I don’t have to feel pressured into doing things I don’t want to do. I don’t have the headaches that most people who are married or in relationships have. It’s been very good for me, but being in relationships isn’t for everyone, just because society has this idea of marriage. That does not mean that all women are material for marriage or having children. As there are men who enjoy solitude, so there are also women who enjoy being single.

I have met more depressed married women and men than you can shake a stick at. Most people just mirror the image of being happily married or in a relationship on Facebook or Instagram is trying to shame others into thinking they are missing something or are not complete. Happiness starts with your ability to be happy alone and live your best life.

It’s not wrong to be married or in a relationship, nor is it wrong to enjoy being single. These are some of the rationalizations used by some women to justify why they are single, but deep down, these women want the company of a man and what that company can offer. Mentality that we observe in the classic feminist attitudes of white women on television and panel programs talking about the empowerment of women. Under the expression, “I don’t need a man to be happy and self-realized as a woman,”

The issue is that women are considered to be the most vulnerable when it comes to the failure of a relationship or failure to receive a relationship because of the behavior traits that can be discovered in many men, such as non-empathetic manipulation and promiscuous agendas toward women, on a greater scale by comparison to women behaviors. Where as women are seen as prey since they are sensitive and look forward to inviting a male into their life for the sake of a relationship with sex. Women should be careful and hold men to men, but they should not obligate themselves to not express their desires if they are similar to what a man wants.

Right now, when you observe the promiscuous behavior of both men and women, perhaps a product of the destruction of the black family, the values of what it means to be a man were lost, but also the valuation of a black woman, in the that impeccable moral behavior was part of that characteristic.

It is something that women lose at this time and all because of the desire of women to want to be treated, do and live like men, not understanding that when a man chooses a partner, a woman’s moral conduct is a factor to consider when choosing a partner, but that is when analyzing the question of Why can’t black women get a good man? Now you can understand why black women don’t want to know that answer.

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