There is no doubt that there are many single black women right now, but what is the reason for these problems that are affecting the black family structure right now in the United States? Let’s try to answer this question from a black man’s perspective. Someone who has been single my entire adult life, who is off or on in a romantic relationship, whatever you want to call it, where pleasure and temporary companionship was the only reason he was with a black woman and is now trying to get into the dating market looking for a good black woman to raise a family.

Women can talk all day about the failures of men and the ‘crimes’ they commit, and men can talk and cry in the community about the things women do, and yes, some of the claims both sides make are legitimate.

But something missing from this conversation is the responsibility that both parties have for the failure of the marital relationship, or the lack of serious commitment to understanding the genesis of the problems and the long-term solutions. Within that same conversation, we must also point out the lack of a strategy in the search for real solutions where opinions, desires and aspirations are taken into account.

However, if you actually do want a relationship, then how is complaining about toxic men getting you closer to a good man? There is nothing wrong with healthy discussion, but at what point do you look in the mirror and actually say it is time to work on myself and actually pursue what I want and ignore those who don’t meet your requirements? And not just that, when do you stop painting a group of people, men or women, with the same brush?

Educated women who have accepted the feminist mantra of not “settling” for a man below their education and social and economic level are taking a very elitist and alienating approach to relationships. The notion that a blue collar working man is somehow inferior, coupled with very unrealistic expectations of a successful man by educated women, severely limits the choices, that educated women have for relationships and marriage.

How important is the educational level of black woman to get a great black man who is committed to a marital relationship?

We don’t care about your degrees, how much money you have, or the car you drive. That is masculine energy. We want soft, vulnerable energy from a woman. We want to lead, and we want you to need us. Break out of that protective, safe, and ultimately lonely synthetic bubble of that phone and get into the real world.

And you will discover that life is waiting for you like a gift to open and explore. That is why it is important that women know what their role is when they enter into a healthy relationship with a man with the same attitudes and mentality. A mentality of cooperation, not of competition about who is in charge.

Do you like being judged by your physical appearance? Well, neither do we as men. In other words, do you only talk to men who have a perfect physical body and age? Do you like being used for a booty call for sex? Well, we don’t like being used for a foodie call for a free meal.

Do you only want to go after the alpha males? If that’s what you want, then you’re going to be used for your resources. If you want to go through a lot of dates to find Mr. Right, This is what I would suggest. Go on coffee dates. The man is not investing a lot of time and money.

It’s safe for the both of you, and within 15 to 30 minutes, you should be able to see if there’s chemistry between you two. Then, if there is chemistry, maybe you could Continue that date with a walk, going out to dinner, and getting to know each other more intimately. In closing, do not bring that cell phone with you on your coffee date. In fact, get your nose and ears out of your electronic devices and enjoy the real world.

The rule of black women marrying up and men marrying down is alive and well. However, if you are a black woman in the upper ten percent of the social and economic elite looking for a man at the same level or higher, your choices will be very limited. College graduation rates for black women and men since 1984 show that for every man who earns a degree, there are three black women earning a degree.

How much does the bad attitude of some black women negatively affect their chances of finding a good black man?

College-educated women are now the majority in the workforce over college educated men and are taking jobs that were once held by men, resulting in a situation where the success of women is depriving them of the successful men they seek. The disparity between college-educated successful women and college-educated successful men only gets worse as people grow older in the workforce.

The more successful a woman is, the fewer options she has. The more successful a man is, the more options he has. Women view men as success objects. Men view women as pleasure objects or beauty objects. Men are valued by their resources, while black women are valued by their appearance. Appearance declines as we age while money increases. Men don’t care about a woman’s money, her job title, her degrees, etc.

People looking for genuine connections and relationships are not looking at the financials or the appearance, but the way one makes them feel. The feeling of knowing someone wants to understand, appreciate, support and value them is what both parties aspire to have. When competition begins and ego can’t be left at the door, the situation becomes tainted.

Ladies should not seek to compete with or downplay a man’s assets or accomplishments in any way, and men should not expect women to cater to every little thing based on some antiquated belief that they are there to serve them. Come to the table ready to contribute and build a home together. Each should be encouraging their partner at all times.

Men don’t expect women to be providers, so your career doesn’t matter as much. Men are very easy. We have to be physically attracted to you; you have to be feminine and sweet; attentive and open to having sex the way he likes, which varies amongst men, and someone who’s grounded. most important, making time for him.

One problem is that black women have absolutely no idea ​​what is defined as a “good black man”. If you ask 3 different women, you will essentially get a variation of answers: Someone nice, tall, can communicate, doesn’t talk too much, is Christian, has good morals, is educated, has street smarts, and so on. Often their past relationships, totally believing what they’re looking for. Black women wants an educated man making 6 figures with his own home from him, but last night they had sex with a dude living on his buddy’s couch, no job and 4 baby mamas. The emphasis has always been on what black women are looking for.

Right now, what can a black woman really contribute to a marital relationship?

The real question is, “What can black women offer to a relationship? Specifically, what tangible tools can black women bring to the table that will sustain a serious relationship or marriage over time? In most cases, black women will immediately point to their job or education. But what the hell do you do if you lose your job? Or if the job market turns and your MBA degree is not worth toilet paper, Again, what tangible and significant skills and behaviors do you bring to the table? When you ask this to a black woman.

This only demonstrates that, for the most part, there are legitimate reasons why black women remain single, and they should stay single until they figure it out. It should be no insult or shame that the legacy of black people is that the majority of our people are born and raised in single parent homes. It is what it is.

There is nothing you can do about it, if you accept that bad attitude as something real, you can be sure that nothing can be changed and we continue to push on the new generation the lack of initiative of the people of the past, for refusing to be part of the solution, not thinking about themselves but about the new generation.

Apparently, we see no benefit to two married parent homes as this statistic has been in place for some time, and the situation is only getting worse as more black children are being raised in foster care or by grandparents, and there is an increase in the number of black women having children with multiple men.

The majority of the black women with college degrees or high paying jobs want a guy who’s rich, tall, athletic, has a college degree, and has good looks. The funny thing is that the black women that are like this have kids, are overweight, have a ton of drama, or are emotionally crazy. If they come across a good man, they’ll give him an attitude and say he’s not on “her level”. Some will use their degree or job positions as an excuse and say guys are “intimidated by their success”. You women, stop with this.
I am a strong, independent, educated, have my own money, don’t need anything, etc. That is a turn-off! For me.

Men don’t want to deal with successful women because they are masculine. We don’t want to have to deal with the headache of putting you into your feminine energy. Successful women who are not feminine are too much work.

Why do many black women look for a high value black man who makes good money when they bring nothing to the table?

Ultimately, they become independent and successful because they are afraid of “depending” on a man. Men are learning not to deal with women like that. What’s your definition of success? The problem is that you think you’re smarter and more valuable to men than you actually are. Men value the traditional roles of women, not career women.

A majority of black women with low-paying jobs want a tall, athletic, good-looking guy that’s either a lady’s man or a thug that they think they can change. When these types of women come across a good man, they’ll say he’s “too nice” or they’ll just use him. These thirsty and desperate guys who are chasing these women need to ask themselves a question. What makes them so much of a catch ? Are they really worth chasing after ? Good men today are not good enough for today’s women.

High earning men making over $100,000 are not concerned about a woman’s income because he is already in the top 15% of earners in the country. Too many women are looking for that guy but the Good man making 40K to 50K is looked down on by many women.

Let’s talk about the myth behind the expression “a strong, independent black woman does not need a
man.” This is a mindset promoted by some figures in the world of music and entertainment who, based on wealth and fame, can afford not to have a man to pay the bills. But those same women are looking for a black man to feel security, love, intimacy and above all, pleasure.

One thing is what an independent and strong woman says in public, and another thing is what they say behind the camera, and some black women with little resources fall for that lie, without understanding that they are being manipulated by selfish and self-centered women. That only thinks about herself.

Many black women with a low economic level and education, with little probability of having a good man, accept that mindset as realistic, created by the delusion that “strong, independent women who do not need a man” projects. Women who keep repeating these expressions in a position of economic, social and emotional dependency, acting under the fantasy that they are in the same position as black artists who use this expression to justify why they are single.

For women who are watching this video, I have the impression that men want a woman who is fit, friendly, cooperative, and above all, surrounded by feminine energy. As an independent woman, whatever masculine energy you have, leave it when you open the door of the house, and you will be contributing to having a healthy relationship with your partner, something that, at the end of the day, is what you really want as a successful woman.